Intentional friendship activities can change your classroom culture! One year, I had a particularly challenging group of third graders in terms of classroom culture. They just did not get along. They frequently treated each other unkindly. There were, of course, a few ringleaders, but it seemed like many of the other kids just kind of went along.
Every teacher has had that class where the students just can’t seem to be nice to each other. These seven tips will give you ideas for how to help children get along in your class. We hope you see an improvement in positive relationships and niceness after implementing them!
Here are some of the things my teaching partner and I did to try to make the situation better:
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Every teacher has had that class where the students just can’t seem to be nice to each other. These seven tips will give you ideas for how to help children get along in your class.
We put a small copy of the picture above on every student’s desk, and we encouraged students to think about their words before they spoke, especially when talking about another person. The statement should pass all three gates before it is spoken. This is one of the many effective friendship activities to help promote kindness.
We read There’s a Boy in the Girl’s Bathroom by Louis Sachar out loud to the class. If you are not familiar with this book, give it a read. Sachar does an amazing job of telling the story of how a rejected child finds acceptance. Every time I read it, I tear up when Bradly finally gets his first gold star. Reading books that focus on acceptance and kindness is another great friendship activity.
Reading Our Class is a Family can also be a wonderful addition to your friendship activities. This book helps foster a sense of community and belonging in the classroom. It encourages students to see their classmates as a family, promoting kindness, empathy, and mutual support. The themes in this book align well with social-emotional learning (SEL) objectives and can serve as a foundation for building a positive classroom environment. Integrating this book into your lessons can help students develop stronger friendships and a deeper understanding of their role in creating a supportive classroom community.
We started the “I Saw You Do Something Good!” program, which was basically small forms that students could fill out when they witnessed a classmate doing something nice. Teachers could also fill out the forms. All the forms went into a jar, and a few were picked each week for small prizes. Each student also got to keep all their forms from other students. Peer recognition is one of the friendship activities that can boost positive behavior in the classroom.
We role-played positive solutions to common classroom problems. These friendship activities helped students practice how to handle conflicts and support each other.
In PE, we played cooperative team-building games to help students learn to work together. This had varying success. Sometimes it worked remarkably well. Other times, students argued about strategy or unfairness. We soon learned which games to avoid. At the same time, we steered clear of competitive games both in PE and in the classroom. Cooperative games are excellent friendship activities to build teamwork.
We used several journal prompts about friendship. For example:
Journal writing is one of the friendship activities that encourages students to reflect on their own behaviors and relationships.
I actually love a good art project, but for that year, we made coupon books. Each student came up with their own coupons for nice things they could do for their parents. These friendship activities encouraged students to think about ways to be kind to their family members.
Most of these ideas could be integrated into our normal school day and curriculum, so we really didn’t have to spend much extra time “teaching friendship.” For the most part, it worked. Our classroom did become a kinder place. There was one girl who, as far as I can tell, was immune to all of it. Although she continued to be a challenge, she did become less popular with her peers, which lessened her influence.
Making friends is not easy for every child. If some of your students are struggling, or if you just have one of those classes that doesn’t get along, reading a pertinent book out loud could help. I asked my Facebook followers for their favorite books about friendship, and of course, they had all kinds of great ideas. Thanks so much to all who contributed! If you want more details on a particular title, just click on the link in the book’s title or on the image and you will be taken to Amazon, where you can read more.
Books about friendship are important for every classroom, whether they’re the class novel you choose to read, the book you read aloud to the class, or options in your classroom library. Making friends isn’t easy for every child, and some kids need guidance on how to make friends and how to be good friends.
NOTE: As Amazon Associates, we earn from qualifying purchases.
Making friends is not easy for every child. If some of your students are struggling, or if you just have one of those classes that doesn’t get along, reading a pertinent book out loud could help. I asked my Facebook followers for their favorite books about friendship, and of course, they had all kinds of great ideas. Thanks so much to all who contributed! If you want more details on a particular title, just click on the link in the book’s title or on the image and you will be taken to Amazon, where you can read more.
Books about friendship are important for every classroom, whether they’re the class novel you choose to read, the book you read aloud to the class, or options in your classroom library. Making friends isn’t easy for every child, and some kids need guidance on how to make friends and how to be good friends. Including books as part of your friendship activities can make a big difference.
NOTE: As Amazon Associates, we earn from qualifying purchases.
Incorporating chapter books that focus on friendship can be a powerful part of your friendship activities. Here are some recommendations:
“I like the chapter book The Hundred Dresses by Eleanor Estes to start the school year in 4th grade. It has a wonderful message about not standing by and watching while someone else gets bullied. It also teaches kids not to be a follower.” – Michelle Byram James
“Great for talking about friendship and bullying. I always start out the year with it with my 4th graders.” – Susan Neel
“Sometimes being a good friend is hard.” – Sarah Miller
“Wonder… New book!! I so love it!!!” – Stacey Thomas McNerney
“I love that one of the main characters in this book is an EC child and the relationship that builds.” – Lisa Travis
“We find friends everywhere and in the least likely people and places.” – Danielle Dillon
“For my fourth graders, I use Because of Winn-Dixie to show that friendship comes in all shapes and sizes/ages.” – Cindy Corp
“I don’t know how ‘old’ you want to go, but my 7th graders read The Outsiders every year and it is always well-received.” – Laurel Stone
“Charlotte’s Web to show what friends are willing to do for each other.” – Cindy Corp
“Friends come in all packages. In the end it is true friendship that endures!” – Gardner’s Book Service
“Greatest book about friendship ever! We used it in 4th grade as a whole novel study, including vocabulary, comprehension tests, and lots of crafts.” – Linda Jones Doherty
“It is about how friendship changes as we grow and develop (but told cleverly). It points out that even though we may be different, bigger, etc., we can still be friends because the friendship is greater than the change.” – Karina Darling
“The Lions of Little Rock…story of two girls of different races in the 60s and their friendship. Very powerful book.” – Amanda Rayburn
“There’s a Boy in the Girls’ Bathroom by Louis Sachar is one of my favorite read alouds with my 4th graders. The students can relate to the characters, and they learn valuable lessons about true friendship and acceptance from Bradley Chalkers and Jeff Fishkin.” – Melany McCauslin Rios
“One of my childhood favorite chapter books is Just As Long As We’re Together by Judy Blume. It always reminds me of the song ‘Make New Friends,’ the words of which go, ‘Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other’s gold. A circle is round. It has no end. That’s how long I want to be your friend.’” – Josette Soard Nase
“I just finished reading The Sorta Sisters by Adrian Fogelin, which is about two girls who have never met but become friends through writing letters back and forth to each other. It would be neat to somehow incorporate reading this book with a pen pal activity.” – Josette Soard Nase
“I like any Humphrey the Hamster books. They seem too young for my 4th graders but they love Humphrey. He is a classroom hamster who helps his human classmates with problems ranging from bullying to hurt feelings. He helps out some of the adults, as well. I also like the way the students in Humphrey’s class have personalities and lives that are found in my class.” – Rachel Geyer
“Tells a story of an unlikely friendship between two boys who rely on each other’s strengths to overcome their own weaknesses.” – Krista Moser
“Two unlikely misfits find friendship. I have never met a middle school kid that didn’t relate to that book.” – Charlee Nall Allen
“Great for the friendship between a boy and his pet fly! 1st-2nd grade reading level, but my 4th graders LOVE Fly Guy!” – April Dawn Davidson
Picture books are also excellent for friendship activities. Here are some recommendations:
Yo! Yes? by Chris Raschka
“Children’s book about friendship…Yo! Yes? It’s great! Not a lot of words, but kids get it. Great for inference!” – Melanie Stubbs-Kight
Leonardo the Terrible Monster by Mo Willems
“It is about the decision making to BE a friend.” – Lisa Weber Mattes
Hugs from Pearl by Paul Schmid
“The social worker and I (SLP) co-taught Hugs from Pearl. I got the idea from Pinterest. Super cute for the K-1 age group.” – Shelly Gehring Gervase
Enemy Pie by Derek Munson
“I use it with my fourth graders (although it would be appropriate for younger kids, too) because it tells about one boy deciding not to like another boy until he actually spends time with him and gets to know him. They become fast friends.” – Kim Arnold
My Best Friend by Mary Ann Rodman
“Great book teaching kids about to like themselves and to not be someone they’re not.” – Allison Perani Hogan
Elmer the Elephant by David McKee
“Themes of friendship, differences, acceptance. Easy to do extension art project: tissue paper pieces on a white elephant–cut out, spritz with water, watch the beautiful colors run, shake off tissue when dry – voila! Your very own Elmer!” – Lynn M. Chiafullo
Adding more books to your classroom library can enhance your friendship activities. Here are additional suggestions from teachers:
Cork & Fuzz: Best Friends by Dori Chaconas
The Giving Tree by Shel Silverstein (though you might want to have a discussion about establishing boundaries and how much giving is too much)
Holes by Louis Sachar
Bridge to Terabithia by Katherine Paterson
Andrew Henry’s Meadow by Doris Burn
Maniac Magee by Jerry Spinelli
The Sandwich Swap by Queen Rania of Jordan
The Crayon Box that Talked by Shane Derolf
Somebody Loves You, Mr. Hatch by Eileen Spinelli
Christina Katerina and the Box by Patricia Lee Gauch
The Frog and Toad Collection by Arnold Lobel
Each Little Bird that Sings by Deborah Wiles
A Taste of Blackberries by Doris Buchanan Smith
If you are working on friendship in your class, then you might also want to download these free friendship cards:
Friendship Task Cards for Grades 1-5 – Social skills prompts to help your students make and keep friends.
By integrating these books and activities, you can create a comprehensive approach to friendship activities in your classroom, helping students to build strong, positive relationships.
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